August 2024

Dumb phones

Yay! Updates continue! One might say I'm actually getting good at this u‿ u* . Anyway on with the entry... So while I was scrolling the top blogs on spacehey recently, I saw a blog talking about 'living like its the 2000s'. I never actually finished the post because they mentioned this subreddit, r/dumbphones, and its unlocked so many thoughts in my brain.

Dumb phones is dedicated to talking about dumb phones (obviously) which is like old or dumbed down phones that, for most people in the subreddit, is an attempt to unplug from all the crazy mind-numbing stuff you get on a modern smart phone. As most people are, I'm aware of how social media is bad and blah blah blah. I believe I've talked about my thoughts and experiences with this kind of stuff somewhere before but I'm gonna talk about it again here since it'd be helpful I suppose. I've never considered myself 'addicted' to my phone. One time I was really into bejeweled and had a sook when asked to get off the computer as a child, but beyond that I've never considered my screen time a serious concern. I've seen what it's like on the other end a few times too. Being at friends' houses and their parents yelling, threatening to unplug a computer, sitting with a friend, bored, while they sit silently on their phone on the other side of the room. Again this is when me and my friends were smaller, perhaps Going Through It™ aswell. But what I'm saying is I've always seen phone addiction as a thing that causes issues in some way, not just 'is unhealthy but not in a way that bothers me or others'.

Despite this I do recognise none of this is natural or good, you don't miss out on anything of value by unplugging (except maybe cat memes). I do take steps to keep my attention span healthy-ish. Something I'm so sure I've brought up on multiple occasions but can't seem to find anywhere is my experience with tiktok. Years ago now I decided to download it after watching a ton of compilations on youtube and deciding it might've been worth just getting the app itself. Within minutes I struggled to find the kinds of videos I was actually interested in, the kinds of videos I'd seen in the compilations, saw the videos I was finding to be just mean???, and ultimately just deleted the app. There was truly just nothing appealing about it. A few years later (this now being about a year ago), I was a big user of instagram, as I had been for years, but now my interests were developing into that super aesthetic, buy buy buy, kind of content. I had no money so I wasn't actually wasting anything on the products being advertised, but with instagram slowly being tiktok-ifyed, and with 'influencers' basically sharing their tiktok videos using instagram, I once again decided to give it a try. Why watch tiktoks on instagram when I could watch tiktoks on tiktok? First thing I was greeted with was videos about pet death ￣︿￣. No warning, no chance to decide what I wanted to see, just... that.

The layout of everything was different to what I remember, keep in mind also that I used to use it quite frequently as musically, but even from that it felt so much less easy to use? Like okay we all understand how doomscrolling works and how tiktok is the perfect formula for that and whatever but I've never seen anyone talk about how completely alien it feels to use?? I'm not sure how to describe it, and my friends have declined to share screenshots of their tiktoks to help jog my memory on what I struggled with so much (wusses), but I think even moving from instagram it just, made no sense to me? It's core function is to be a doomscroller, if you will, and yet its acts as though its capable of so much more. With instagram (or at least old instagram, last I checked it's followed in tiktoks footsteps on this) you had a home page, for people and tags you follow, then an explore page which is laid out in a grid which you first pick out something and then doomscroll to your heart's content. Tiktok has a for you page which just combines the two and make it's own choices about what you must like to see. Then in an attempt to still have a functioning explore page, it categorises some videos into lines and autoplays, like, one video on each line anyway. This is absolutely to peoples different tastes but I found it simply too overwhelming, I don't need half a dozen videos all autoplaying at me at one time. At least with instagram it was (mostly) still images that I could look over at my own pace. This isn't really articulating exactly what I felt so bizarre but I feel as though I cant go on without trying to describe something.

Okay so, mildly inconsequential rant over, point is I didn't like tiktok. Worse, I found myself using it regardless of that fact. It showed me videos that I would never have chosen to watch otherwise. I didn't enjoy what it was giving me to watch. I tried to train it to show me my interests by interacting with the things I wanted to see more of, but time and time again it showed me videos that I spent longer watching, even if in my mind I knew I wasn't actually interested in it. It so perfectly illustrated to me what I knew to avoid. Like you hear people use these seemingly hyperbolic descriptions about short form content turning your brain to slush or whatever but that was so perfectly what I felt was happening. And at least I could pick up on it because my god I could watch those satisfying brick laying videos all day but why? What for? I could remember opening the app up between tasks, like after coming home for the day knowing I'd want to record a video maybe or whatever it was I had planned. Then I found myself just sitting there scrolling tiktok thinking "this isn't how I want to spend my time". It was all written right there on the wall in big bold fluorescent letters, I'm gaining nothing of value from this, and while it wasn't hard for me to get rid of tiktok, it still took me a while to finally make that decision. And I never did end up finding those videos that brought me there to begin with.

Around the same time I also deleted my instagram, more so because I became more aware of data privacy or whatever its called (not that I feel equally concerned about it on other social media as you might notice, just something about instagram/facebook really got on my nerves I guess), and the incomprehensible amount of ads. I still had access to instagram but I never really touched it again until yesterday I deleted it from my phone completely, hopefully for good this time. I feel like that point was kind of important, nothing major but something to remember occasionally.

I've done a few other things in the quest for not letting my brain melt, but upon discovering r/dumbphones (ah yes that's right, that's what I was talking about) I was kind of re-awakened to just how far I could take this. Since making that assessment of "I'm not addicted to my phone" I've grown a lot and I'm looking forward, almost, to doing better. It's like I'm in the early stages of a journey I don't even know I started. Seeing people carry around books, journals and digi cams as everyday going out items and thinking "hey, I've been doing that" (perhaps for different reasons but not far from the same idea). Seeing all the other items they pack and seeing myself able to do the same. Maybe even I could make the switch to a dumb phone. Maybe that's exactly what I want.

I don't think I'm quite there unfortunately but its a very possible goal, or at the very least I do have new goals that are maybe closer to what I saw on r/dumbphones than what I ever pictured myself doing. Another item I saw people carry were DSs (DS' ??? you know, a nintendo ds). I own a ds lite but for a while I've wanted to get a more recent model so I can play more games, but I've no idea how to go about doing that. I brought it up with my friends and one has helped me look for one and buy it, or will help me buy it when I pick one. I initially just wanted a 3ds, but after a quick bit of looking I decided that despite its less appealing looks (I'm sorry, only 2 colours????) it might be better to get a 'new' 3ds. I don't care if everyone says its terrible I want to play minecraft on my ds, okay? I want the extra buttons even if they're really a little odd and probably not used in most games. Unfortunately however, while I gamble the currently available dss online in hopes of *the perfect* ds for a price I can actually afford, I have to save my money, which mean no dumb phone for now :(

Speaking of dumb phones I actually wasn't done talking about them. Just had to cover that bit about the ds first so we all understand that I cant spend money right now. But that's also not the only reason I cant get a dumb phone at the moment. My biggest issue at the moment is probably that I need an app for my work. Like yeah, I could maybe explain I had to downgrade for whatever reason but I'm not looking to make these people hate me alright? There's also just a lot of other Important Life Things™ that I've been taught how to do on my phone that I'm not ready to re-learn how to do on a computer right now. Also having seen people in my life using a dumb phone and not being able to do simple tasks because everything is in an app. Like it happens a surprising amount, and maybe for more important things there's a work around but my social anxiety is not prepared to ring up a place to confirm an appointment simply because I cant click on a link in a message to confirm it on their website?? (again workarounds - I could maybe type the link into a computer and confirm there but would that even work?? Its all too stressful I simply cannot cope...). Or even things that aren't necessary as such but are still incredibly helpful, like being able to check my banking app before I buy something at the shops.

Now I know the next logical step is to turn my current phone into a dumb phone (making everything look super dull and unattractive and only listing the apps that are important). I've seen other people do it to there phones, and I'm sure there's a way to do it on mine, but I think a big part of the appeal for me is the literal phone itself. Like I'm not throwing out the idea of dumbing down my smart phone, as I've been writing this I've been considering it more and more, but why wouldn't I want a FLIP PHONE?? Doesn't that sound so cool?? Like seriously?!!??!? Remember how I said those people were showing off what they carry around with them during the day? Like, please forgive me because I know this isn't the point, but the vibes of having my journal, my digi cam, my keys, my compact mirror, my purse, my ds, my little box of tic tacs, all complimented by a BLINGED OUT FLIP PHONE? I want it so bad. So despite not being able to buy them I have been looking at flip phones. And since I'm not at the point of wanting to completely unplug (pinterest + youtube my beloveds), I wanted to look into smart flip phones.

One of the more popular ones that seems like it does the jobs I want it to do, is the samsung folder 2? I see people all over pinterest and youtube (yeah haha, I just said I cant live without them) using and reviewing it, usually by showing off how it can run instagram, against their aesthetic backgrounds. There's also at least one other similar phone I saw but I don't recall the name or brand. Now if I actually want to go through with getting one of these not-dumb-dumb-phones then there's some other issues. Firstly getting information about these phones is hard. The most information I see is from those youtube reviewers I mentioned before, like I cant even find the samsung phone on the samsung website. In fact I've never seen these phones advertised anywhere, ever, outside of aesthetic pinterest hell. A lot of these smart flip phones seem to be common in places like japan, because of course, but that means getting your hands on one that functions outside of japan becomes difficult because of region and sim card locking or something???? I've seen mentions of things such as emergency service numbers not working or getting bad to no signal on a phone not designed for where you live or your phone service provider, which makes sense but not enough sense that I know what to look for in one of these phone to know if it will work where I live.

I know so many of my issues would be fixed if I focused less on aesthetics and what not, but right now, despite a lot of what I said at the start of this entry, having my things look fun and nice is a big drive for me and if I'm spending money (more money than I could probably spend anyway) on these things I want them to be something I'm happy with. The new phone thing is still ages away since my current phone works fine and I have no choice because of money right now anyway. For now I'm focusing on getting this ds (fingers crossed) and I'll work out the rest later. Perhaps even, I might change my mind about what I'm looking for in a phone. Oh, and also before I wrap this up too neatly: mp3 players o(≧O≦o)

Uhh, okay I didn't mean to type for this long. I was gonna finish by saying "instead of sitting on youtube or my phone after this, I'm going to get some journalling or something done tonight" but by the time this goes up I think it might be time to go to bed TwT Oh well. I'll definitely have to make some updates to how the monthly blogs are displayed so you can read individual entries if I think they're worth separating to some degree. Ahhh too many thoughts, I better get onto it so we'll just have to see :3